How high is the throne 02: What the brain forget… the heart remembers… part 1

•October 12, 2008 • Leave a Comment

Finally…. UK… I am here…

Southampton… I am here…

Degree…. I am here…



Afif Elias Al-Afro…

No body understand what happen to him at matriks, neither do I. He suddenly became an ultra ultra workaholic. Doing revision till 2am, almost everyday. No body know where and how he got the drive.

No body know, neither do I… But now.. I do..


2 years ago, when I entered KY and got this scholarship, I was excited to be able to get an oppurtunity to study abroad. Overseas, United Kingdom, it was like …. “WOW!”. Of all people.. I GOT IT  :D.

People keeps on saying, you already got one of your feet over the fence, time to get the other one over it.

But who knows…. to get the other feet…. was …. GOD DAMN HARRRRDDDDD….. and I barely made it…

It was all due to my further math (saying it again, made me have this uneasy feeling at my stomach).

It was all due to my arrogance, for taking it lightly. I just though,

“Ah, just another math. what we need to do is just give an extra effort.”

And of course… I WAS WAAAAAYYYYY WRONG :P.  You need to put like 100 times the effort…



I made a promise back then…

“Oh god, please let me fly… Please, give me a second chance.. Please… don’t let me fail…”

There was when I realized… that is what Afif was doing in matriks…

Taking the second chance…

some news…. I GOT TO PACK!

•September 15, 2008 • Leave a Comment

so.. cam ni ah. nak kena start packing. since my first sister dah sarat mengandung dan perut nak pecah any time ja :P…

jadi kena start packing dan memang agak bz. mensettlekan hal yg x settle. jadi, x dak time nak dok depan pc pikir dan menulis….

so… dont expect so much updates. since writer ke 2 pun 2 x 5. dia baru balik UK dan tengah settledown..

Commercial time= Toilet time 03: “Sorafune” and it is official!

•September 12, 2008 • Leave a Comment
SORAFUNE!!! (Airship)

SORAFUNE!!! (Airship)

“Aku masuk ja chalet tu, aku dengar lagu Sorafune. Dekat 24 jam diorang pasang.” Said Ariff Sodri Al-Seniorcorrupt when E.G Al-Exorcist downloaded the song. It happened around 1 and a half year ago.



Some of my friends like to post a song at their page. Most of them is love song, some are Islamic song. But all of them said, “This song means something for me.” Ok, no comment on that. Each people, has their own type of song.

Example: “lirik pulak kena ar dgn jiwa kami hehe.” from Syukri Al-UselessChef , huhu =P. Jgn marah syuk…..

I too have my own favourite type of song. Most of them are inspiration song. Not love inspiration, but hope and dreams inspiration. I always choose a theme song for some events or agenda. During my third sem at college, I choosed a “Hero come back” song (naruto shippudend OST) and “Does” by shura (Gintama EST) for my 4th sem.

So, for my next journey to UK (insyaAllah, with God’s will), I choose this song. “SORAFUNE” (airship) by TOKIO (“My boss, my hero” theme song).


sono fune o koide yuke omae no te de koide yuke
omae ga kiete yorokobu mono ni omae no ôru o magaserana

sono fune wa ima doko ni furafura to ukande iru no ka
sono fune wa ima doko de boroboro de susunde iru no ka
nagasaremai to sakarai nagara
fune wa idomi fune wa itami
subete no suifu ga osore o nashite nige satte mo

sono fune o koide yuke omae no te de koide yuke
omae ga kiete yorokobu mono ni omae no ôru o magaserana

sono fune wa mizukara o chûsen sorafune to wasurete iru no ka
sono fune wa maiagaru sono toki o wasurete iru no ka
chihei no hate suihei no hate
sono ga fune no ririku chiten
subete no minato ga akari o keshite damarikon demo

sono fune o koide yuke omae no te de koide yuke
omae ga kiete yorokobu mono ni omae no ôru o magaserana

nani no shiken no jikan nanda nani o sabaku hakari wa kari nan da
nani o neratte tsukiaun da nani ga fune o ugokasun da
nani no shiken no jikan nanda nani o sabaku hakari nan da
nani o neratte tsukiaun da nani ga fune o ugokasun da

sono fune o koide yuke omae no te de koide yuke
omae ga kiete yorokobu mono ni omae no ôru o magaserana
sono fune o koide yuke omae no te de koide yuke
omae ga kiete yorokobu mono ni omae no ôru o magaserana




*Sail, oh ship, may you keep sailing ever onward
Row, oh ship, with your own hands keep moving forward
Don’t entrust your ever so precious oars
Into the hands of tho~se who will rejoice when you are gone.

There used to be a ship
The one that seems to float
Unsteady in the wind
I wonder where she now is roaming
Oh the ragged sails
Of that haggard boat
How far can she get
Where now is her destination

Vowing that she’ll not give in
She sails against the wind
Challenging the elements
Filled with pains of battle
Even if all, of her crew, have given into fear
And they have fled from her.

Rpt *

Has that weary ship
Forgotten what she is
That not of the sea
No, but of the sky she was made
Does she still recall
That time drawing near
Does she know the day
When she’ll have to fly away~

On the edge of the earth
The place of the horizon’s birth
That is where she will cast off
That will be her final port
Even if all, the ports of the world, have now gone still
and all the lights are gone.

Rpt *

What’s the test that now approaches?
What will the scales be judging?
I wonder what’s her final heading?
I wonder what force keeps her moving?

Rpt *

How high is the throne 01: Before you cook, you got to make sure the chicken has been marinaded!!!

•September 12, 2008 • Leave a Comment

“Aren’t you happy that you are going to fly?”, said brother Zul, my brother’s best friend.

“Of course I am.”

“Then SMILE!!! Look happier!”

Oops , he got me there  =).





Okay, 25th September is drawing closer, day by day. I am making the best preparation that I can.

Passport, check.

Medical report, check.

Travelling beg, check.

Underwear, …. check.

Visa, checking!!!!



Mental check....

Mental check....

“So how is the preparation?” sms from my friend.

“Preparing!! 85% completed, but visa is the hardest.” I replied.

“I mean about mental preparation.”


“Already said my goodbye, and received wishes of luck” (she surely knows what am I talking about :P)



“So, you do know that you have to stay at the MSD for a day right? Since you arrive before night?” said Syauqi As-Soton

“Oh really? Thank you bro for all the help! I shall treat you over there!”

“wokeh, no prob…”

“Magge je lah… hehe.”

Malaysia Student Department.... hmmm... boleh caya ke?

Malaysia Student Department.... hmmm... boleh caya ke?



……… Everytihng goes fine…………… with the arrive of Ramadhan, it helps my spiritual preparation as well.

“Go out with the blondie girl! Don’t go out with the Malay girl. Do the Solah, Don’t skip the solah!!” said my lovely cousin over the phone.

“Okay okay…” I smiled happily…

Wanna GO OUT!!!

Wanna GO OUT!!!



With days passed, I kept on checking with my heart. To make sure there won’t be any doubt left or lingered around. Hate it when it suddenly resurface.

A memory of my first exam spung to my mind

“I am going to take my first A-Level exam, math tomorrow.” said I over the phone.

“Oh, really! No wonder your voice sounds trembling. You must be scared.”

“Me, scared?! NO WAY. I am treambling in excitement!”

because of that 1 SMALL doubt, left me with a C in my math that exam…

To hell I am going to allow it happen again….



I kept on praying…. Pray everynight, that God, please… grant me a strengh, stronger than before. Resilience, and a clear heart. Please oh please…. let everything goes well….

I am praying,... not sleeping...

I am praying,... not sleeping...

Turn back the pendulum -02: Heads up!

•September 11, 2008 • 2 Comments
A short post….
What a beutiful sky...

What a beautiful sky... credits to Iman Manan for the picture

If you r there,
Heads up,
Look at the sky,
The cloud and the star,
Look at it,
You will miss it someday.

I used to walk 2-3am in the morning back to my chalet and looked at the sky. The stary night was beautiful, Subhanallah. But my recent trip to KL, all I can see, was a dark sky, with a light that shines the mist of smoke….

Hmm… where are you Mr.twinkle-twinkle little stars?

Turn back the pendulum -01: Eat to live, not live to eat!!!

•September 7, 2008 • 2 Comments

Haha, the tittle soooooo doesn’t suit me :).

Ramadhan is here, thank god we manage to live for another year. The best way to celebrate a Ramadhan is at home. That is what I thought for the last few years. Well…. who wouldn’t think about it?  Come on!! There are a lot of nice food at home, don’t need to rush for prayer, you can relaxing around. Yeah, that is what I used to think.

But after a few days of celebrating Ramadhan at home, I began to miss the Ramadhan at my school and college…. Yeah, seriously. The atmospheres are the one that makes them highly memorable :).


Sadly, I only stay at the asrama when I was form 5. Before that, I stayed at home.

Form 5 was torcherous, seriously. My school starts at 7:20am till 2:15pm. Then, the extra class will start at 3:00pm until 5:00pm. It was a very tough life, especially when the SPM (Malaysia Final Examination for High School) was around the corner. We had to study during the day and continue after Terawih prayer which finish around 10:30pm.

I remembered, we used to live like a zombie during the day. The juniors was celebrating their freedom while we were still trapped like a rat. By hook or by crook, we still had to study T_T. I remembered once when the Bahasa Melayu teacher asked me to write an essay, I told her I don’t had any mood. Luckily, she was a very kind teacher and said, I can do it at night and pass it up tomorrow. Guess what? I don’t think I passed it up :P. Hehe, lazy me.

Around 7:00pm, we will gather at the mussola and waiting for the azan. Once the azan was heard, we break fasted and eat the dates with a cup of water. Then, we prayed solat Maghrib. There was some scheme over her :), only the seniors can be the imam. That means, form 5 students only. There were only a few people can be an Imam at that time. Mat Pi, was the best among us. The problem is…. he always recites a long surah!!  What we do next time was, we sent another person to be the imam and prohibited Mat Pi :).  Haha. After prayer, the juniors were ordered to continue to pray additional solah. Only form 5 students were allowed to take their food at the dining hall first. What an unfair rule :), we seniors rulezzz :D. As for me, I join the juniors to pray the additional solah first, I found that it was extremely unfair of the seniors. but hey, there was nothing wrong to pray.

At the dining hall, the food they served was bad…. yeah, REALLY BADDDD!!!!! The fish were still smelly, the chicken still had some feathers, the vegetables…. well, if u are lucky, you won’t see the snails….. nuff said :P. Any outside food was highly welcomed and be shared by everyone at the same table.

After that, we rested for a while, and continue to pray at the musolla.  It was a 4 terawih prayer, a tazkirah, 4 terawih prayer and 3 witir format. Sometimes, our own student, Amar Hassan Al-Hafiz, led the prayer. He was received a sarong as a gift for being a terawih imam at the end of Ramadhan. Then, we continue with reading Yasiin surah and concluded the night.

After that, all of us will continue lazying around at the dorm. I remembered, I used to walking around, challenging any juniors for a chess game till 12:00 am. Only after that, i continued my studies till 2:00am and went to sleep.

It was a fun and a memorable Ramadhan…..



Basically, a college Ramadhan is less hectic than school Ramadhan. This is due to, the final exam wasn’t that near compared to school time. Well, due to my laziness has finally come again, I am in no mood to write it down :P. Haha.





So that’s it  for now.

May God bless you in this Ramadhan….

How soft is the wind 04: and there goes another one… (aftermath)

•September 7, 2008 • 4 Comments

Sadly, another one of my friend has started a relationship. I was sad upon knowing it. Just because she had a problem, can’t solve it, then came a guy, and she choosed to follow him. I can only pray for the best for her.



A few years ago, I tried to *ehem* tackle this girl :). She brought a book with her one day. I thought that, “Aha, something to break the ice :)”. Slowly I approached her.

“What book is that?”

“This? A compilation of zikir.”

“Can I see it?”

“Sure, here it is.”

I took it and began to flip it. One of the prayer caught my attention. It is a removing sadness prayer. I read it there,

Removing Sadness

Abu Saeed Al-Khudri, may Allah be pleased with him, narrated that one day the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, entered the mosque and found a man from Ansar, named Abu Umamah. He said: “O Abu Umamah! Why do I see you sitting in the mosque outside the time of prayer?” Abu Umamah replied: “Anxieties and debts have remained with me.” The Messenger of Allah asked: “Should I not teach you words, which if you say Allah will remove your anxiety and will settle your debt?” He replied: “Definitely, O Messenger of Allah.” He said: “Say when you wake up in the morning and when you reach the evening: ‘O Allah! I seek Your protection from anxiety and sorrow, and I seek Your protection from helplessness and laziness, and I seek Your protection from cowardice and miserliness, and I seek Your protection from the burden of debts and from the tyranny of men.” Abu Umamah said (later): “I did (as the Messenger of Allah said) and Allah removed my anxiety and settled my debt.” Related by Abu Dawud.

After that, I asked her, “Can I borrow this book for one day? I would like to make a copy of this prayer.”

“Sure, why not?”

From that day onwards, I read the prayer. Of course the result is not instantaneous, but with patience and faith… it will go away by God’s will.

Make it a routine, read it everyday. Hopefully, this will help you.



Oh yeah, I forgot, the aftermath of this soap opera :P. Silly me.

After that, I began to think, doubt began to fill my heart.

“Another one of my friends has started a relationship.. so, when will you? I think about it fr several times. This is a perfect excuse for me to join the group as well. After all, I am 20 years old already. I can think what is right and what is wrong. People can’t blame me for it. I can start a relationship too. Why not?”

Then, I remembered what my friend, Zulfahmi Al-Ploh (yeah… I know), used to say, “Just because most people do it, it is not meant they are right.”

Doubt began to disappear from my heart. Thank god, I am still not easily confused by the situation.

The only thing is, for how long? How much longer will I stay resilience?

I will never know….